Satire | Rift between BCCI and CoA as Australia deny India practice games before tour

Sitting inside his AC car, Mr. Dubey kept sweating profusely thinking how he would accommodate the two guests in the vehicle. The car reached the airport and he got out with two placards – one reading Vinod Rai and the other, Amitabh Choudhary. The three met soon enough, which was followed by an awkward silence although Mr. Dubey tried keeping his smile intact.

The three walked to the car at a brisk pace before Choudhary swiftly opened the nearest door and sat by the window. Rai stopped angrily and so did Dubey, who was confused as to what went wrong now. “I always sit on the left side of the car. He knows that and he did it on purpose,” said Rai. Dubey was silenced. It reminded him of his early marriage days when he used to bring his kids from school.

The journey to the headquarters started with Rai asking the specifics of the meeting. A careless Dubey said, “Sir, didn’t you get the mail about the discussions to be done? I was told it was sent to everyone.”

His statement was followed by a loud laughter by Choudhary, the moment when Dubey realized that he had entered the trap himself. “You know why it is that way, right Vinod? Your job would only be to write the minutes and submit it to the SC,” said Choudhary. “You’re as useless as Ashok Dinda in the death overs.”

The car reached the headquarters in half-an-hour as Rai noticed Ravi Shastri in the lobby while getting down from the car. He knew the evening was spoiled then and there. A voice was heard throughout the building that asked everyone concerned to come to the conference room. A handful of people knew about it, who proceeded to the third floor. Seeing Shastri and Choudhary getting into the lift, Rai decided to use the stairs.

They sat in front of the large screen, waiting for the CA officials to initiate the call dot at 5 pm. Shastri’s unrest was evident, who was nervous if Virat Kohli would even make it before the meeting actually started, and Rai was having his vicarious pleasure watching the coach in trouble. Shastri was wearing his sunglasses in the dim lighted central air-conditioned hall for reasons known to everyone and unknown to few.

“We have changed our policies in the last few months, and this decision is a consequence of that,” said Taylor.

“Could you entertain us with the specifics?” asked Rai in a more civilized manner, trying to make amends for Choudhary’s hasty behaviour earlier.

While everyone was taking their time to understand what was just said, Shashtri, who was quiet all this while, blurted out, “Holy shit! He is using Legion’s voice from Ghostrider!”

While Rai kept looking at Shastri in disbelief, Choudhary asked, “Hold on. When did we throw mud at you? Or are you implying as a cricketing community? ”

“What wrong did we do now?” asked an evidently pissed-off Rai.

“You didn’t allow Windies to practice before their tour,” came a response from the other side.

“We’ve cited the same reason, right?” replied Taylor.

“You know very well Micheal we are not buying that bullshit. We know how many grounds you have and what is the scale of your domestic tournaments,” Choudhary answered.

“Okay, you want to know the truth! Listen,” shouted an angry Choudhary “There was no point wasting ground, facilities, or security behind a team that is coming just for the sake of playing. The team has no one and we have our own problems to deal with. So, we asked ICC to allot them a place in Dubai, which is decent enough!”

A confused Taylor stated, “If this is your hidden reason, I am happy ours is much more reasonable. And how can one practice in Dubai to play in India? We can make similar arrangements for Indian players, do you want?”

“What’s your reason?” asked Choudhary as a befuddled Shastri sat down seeing no one sharing his enthusiasm.

“We are already without Steve and David. The little chance we have of beating you guys is by taking you by surprise. Giving practice games will ruin the very fundamental plan of ours!” said Kasprowicz.

Richardson listened to BCCI’s complaint and thought for a moment before eventually asking, “Amitabh, I can ask CA to change their decision but you have to give me your word in return.”

The BCCI officials kept on staring at the screen as Richardson said, “Come under the purview of WADA and help cricket get into Olympics.”

The awkward silence was broken as Rai turned his attention to Kasprowicz and said, “You have no right to hold any moral high ground if you’re thinking that.”

“Yes, you guys don’t even pay your players well,” said Choudhary cutting Rai, “At least one cannot blame us for that. Disgusting! Dubey, see if any of our players are here at the moment. Call him in and he will say!”

Choudhary and Rai kept staring at each other as Dubey rushed downstairs, while Kasprowicz and Taylor giggled out loud and disconnected the call. The hall was silenced all of a sudden, with Choudhary and Rai sitting with their hands on head, frustrated.

Within no time, Choudhary screamed at him, “This is all your fault! Had you cleared us out of this RTI proceedings, our image would have been clean and none of this would have happened!”

By the time Dubey had come up with Vijay, the duo had already thrown few bottles at each other, and Shastri was seen hiding two bottles in his bag. Dubey’s dream had broken as Vijay had a slight grin on his face.

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